When you know what has been chosen.
When you know its not you.
There is nothing you want to do or hear anymore. All you can do is live life to the best.
And so I will.
I know you'll too.
⥠every page of my imagination
The first day of my final semester. Has not gone well. As usual. Anything I do nowadays do not go well.
I feel like the whole world has given up on me.
But I will push through.
I have to.
With or without you.
⥠every page of my imagination
What is the end of a student's life? What is the beginning of a student's life?
I just attended a graduation 2 days back (my first UQ one) with alot of our friends graduating this semester. Suddenly friends that we see normally all dressed up for the occasion, friends that are graduating dressed in formal wear, in their graduation gowns and mortar hats. Friends I didn't know were graduating were also seen that day. Seeing them on stage makes me think, is this an end to a student's studying life and marks the beginning of another kind of life.
A friend who graduated said he often wondered what is the value of the piece of paper he's holding. He does not understand what the hoo-hah about that piece of paper (an expensive one I might add) till it was finally in his hands. I'm not sure still if he understands the big hoo hah about the piece of paper. I of course as an undergraduate do not understand the full meaning of that piece of paper since it has not been passed to my hands yet. But what I do understand is that the day you get this piece of paper is a day of joy, sadness and tears all in one. Its like a wedding, once in a lifetime. Well, maybe for some people, its more than once but everyone can only graduate as a bachelor graduate once, an honours graduate once, a master graduate once. Its a day where all previous grievances are put down and people shake hands with congrajulations in hand or hugs with love and joy. Its a day where suddenly a whole batch of people become a different set of people. They are graduates. But it was that day that made me finally want to become this way. To wear the same gown. Same mortar board. Hold the same scroll. Same feeling. Because when that day comes, I too will become a graduate and hopefully will be able to understand the meaning behind that expensive piece of paper.
Well, hopefully its just one more semester to that. Because in the middle of it all, the pain, the anger, the tears, the loss of hope will kick in. Just like every other semester. But just like what the graduates say, just hang in there and in no time, you'll get there.
It is never as easy as it sounds. But of course nothing's easy.
Everyone's proud of the graduates. I hope that someday, people will be proud of me too.
Just 13 weeks more...
Congrajulations to all. 
⥠every page of my imagination